May 10th, 2025 – Saturday
Dear Saoirse Today came the bad, sad news. The damage in your brain was so big that the medical team decided that the treatment isn’t proportional anymore. So the treatment will be stopped. Very sad news. Today they’ve stopped the cooling and removed the CFM. Tomorrow the respiration tube will be removed and you will pass away. It’s a hard and difficult decision, very emotional. Mommy and Daddy are here the whole day, that is very nice for you. Tonight you’ve layed on daddy’s and mommy’s chest. There were also people/family to meet you and say goodbye. Your grandparents from Poland are on their way. Your parents are very strong, very loving for you. Dear Saoirse, you’ve fought, but the damage was too big… I wish you, your parents and all the family strength and courage. With love, Sanne | ICU Neonatology Radboud UMC
May 9th, 2025 – Friday
Dear Saoirse What a beautiful girl you are! Mommy thinks you look like daddy, but now with all those monitors on your face and a bandage on your head it’s a bit hard to see. Daddy and Mommy haven’t left your side since yesterday evening and through the night. They want to be with you as much as possible. Not knowing how long you might still be together here. You’ve had such a difficult start to your life and it still looks very concerning now. Last night the CFM, which records your brain activity, showed that you had seizure-like activities, for which you received medication. After the phenobarbital, the pattern became calm again but unfortunately without the activities we want to see. Your ventilation and cooling therapy have continued. The little one looks less pink now, which is good. Mommy already pumped some drops of milk, which you received in your cheek pouch. How brave your Daddy & Mommy are. So much has happened, there are so many emotions and thoughts but they’re strong together. Dear Saoirse, mommy strokes your cheek and head, hoping for some reaction from you. The right path for you will become clear. You are so brave and so loved! Big hug, MarloesICU Neonatology Radboud UMC
May 8th, 2025 – Thursday
Dear Saoirse Today you were born after a pregnancy of 40 weeks and 4 days. You were born at home, only daddy and mommy were there. You had pooped in the amniotic fluid and came into the world not crying, limp. The ambulance came after about 10 minutes and immediately started resuscitation. You were taken to Radboudumc in Nijmegen by the MMT (mobile medical team). You received a breathing tube and are being ventilated by the ventilator. You have monitors on your chest and belly that track your heartbeat and breathing. Around your little hand and foot is a band with a light that checks the oxygen level in your blood (saturation). When you were admitted to the NICU (Neonatology – ICU), you received a special IV in your little hand. This is in an artery; with this we can continuously measure your blood pressure and take blood from it. So we don’t have to poke you all the time, thankfully. Due to the resuscitation, there was an oxygen shortage in your brain. To try to prevent further damage, cooling therapy was started. You’re lying in a special cooling suit, which keeps your body temperature at 33.5°C. This will be for 72 hours and then you’ll be slowly warmed up. To monitor your brain activity, you’re connected to the CFM (Cerebral Function Monitor). This is recorded with tiny needles. At this moment we see very little activity, unfortunately. The coming days will show if there’s any change in the situation. It’s very concerning, dear Saoirse. Until tomorrow, little girl. With love, Sanne | ICU Neonatology Radboud UMC